Friday, June 13, 2014

Streaming King Arthur Online

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King Arthur (2004)King Arthur (2004)
iMDB Rating: 6.3

Date Released : 7 July 2004

Genre : Action, Adventure, Drama, History, War

Stars : Clive Owen, Stephen Dillane, Keira Knightley, Ioan Gruffudd

Movie Quality : BRrip

Format : MKV

Size : 700 MB







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Based on a more realistic portrayal of "Arthur" than has ever been presented onscreen. The film will focus on the history and politics of the period during which Arthur ruled -- when the Roman empire collapsed and skirmishes over power broke out in outlying countries -- as opposed to the mystical elements of the tale on which past Arthur films have focused.


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Review :


Monty Python was more historically accurate

They could also act better and write a decent script. Nothing in this film makes sense:

  • the "britons" who live in Scotland and dress like their predecessors of 4


centuries

  • Pretty much everything about the armour and weapons (far too much to


mention in under 1000 words).

  • In fact everything that tries to pass for history in this


mess

  • The ability of everyone to understand 3 or more languages




  • Britons fighting Saxons in the Borders under a Roman


flag

  • Clive Owen thinking he can act




  • Anyone thinking that script wouldn't make people laugh till it


hurts

  • Roman conscription lasting 15 years and ending with a return to


Rome

  • Low infant mortality rate and model-like mother of 11 healthy


brats(particularly made me laugh)

  • Leaving a well defended fort to fight superior forces in the


open

  • Magical Mystery Fort Doors that close their many-tonned-selves


automatically

  • The phrase "Historians agree"




  • The world's lightest heavy cavalry and most accurate


archers

  • 100s of arrows from 8 bows




  • The cruddy ripoff of Aleksandr Nevsky




  • The many many cruddy ripoffs of Braveheart (a film which despite being


historically laughable is excellent entertainment unlike this one)

And on and on and on and on.....

It's not just that it's poor history it's bad storytelling and makes the film painful to watch even if the script did engender any interest from the audience or the numerous dreadful performances didn't remove any prospect of caring for or about the characters.

1/10 and that's only because of the bit-part guy that put on a funny Somerset accent at one point. He, at least, clearly knew a little bit about the legends and history this farce pretends to represent.

As a final thought - I don't know why Miss Knightley is drawn to bloody awful adaptations of English legends but I wish she'd stop it.



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